A child cannot bring themselves up. They are totally dependent on an adult, usually the parents and teachers, to equip them with the necessary skills that will enable them to take on all the challenges that life presents to them.

It is up to the parent to instill in their child a feeling of high self-esteem, independence, and a need to explore their world with confidence and determination.

Unfortunately, in these modern times, parents have a tendency to be overprotective, mollycoddling, and over-controlling, with the result that many of the children of today mix far too much with adults and as a result have poor social skills with their peers on the playground.

Bullying is a fact of life, and the child who is socially equipped to know how to deal with confrontation and bullying on the playground, will not become a victim that is targeted by a bully.

It is up to the parent to ensure that the child is able to cope with his world. This is done by encouraging and ensuring that the child enjoys taking a challenge, loves to compete, learns to cope with conflict on the playground in an appropriate manner, and is able to identify and deal with a bully in an appropriate manner.

Creating Open Lines of Communication

Parents are communicating with their child from the day they are born. The best way for a parent to communicate with their child as they get older is to instill in them a feeling of responsibility, allowing them to make choices and to take consequences for their choices. Choices need to be pre-empted with clear consequences spelt out when bad choices are made.

Parents also need to understand that the more they do for the child, the more dependent the child becomes on the parent. A dependent child tends to feel insecure, lacks grit and determination, is unable to make appropriate choices, and as a result has difficulty in social relationships.

Parents need to encourage and ensure that whatever a child can do, they must do, e.g. have good manners, dress themselves, learn through consequences, and understand how to behave appropriately in the bigger world.

Trust is the key word in a relationship with your child and it is important for parents to feel confident that their child will behave appropriately in all situations. In other words, they need to trust that when a child is visiting a friend, or left at a birthday party alone, he will feel safe and secure and understand how to handle situations outside of the family home.

If a parent has a child who is being bullied and wants to take some sort of action, she needs to get the child’s permission before interfering in the situation. Often, when parents take the law into their own hands, they often create a huge problem for their child on the playground.

Tips for Parent-School Collaboration

A parent needs to understand that the adult authority figures in a child’s life are parents and teachers. They need to have open communication and work together with the teachers if their child is not coping at school, either in the classroom or the playground.

It is not a good idea to undermine the school’s authority, especially if the parent has not heard the other side of the story. Parents should be involved with school activities and attend parent-teacher meetings. Be actively involved in anti-bullying initiatives at the school.

Signs That Your Child May Be a Victim of Bullying

  • Your child becomes sullen, uncommunicative, and loses interest in their schoolwork
  • Your child hates going to school
  • Unexplained physical injuries or damaged belongings
  • Spends hours playing on digital devices or on the cell phone
  • Is never invited to parties

Empowering Parents to Empower their Child

Many parents tend to believe that it is their job to control and protect their child from inappropriate activities. As a result, the child is always being told what to do and often threatened with punishment if he does not cooperate.

The idea of parenting is to empower your child to deal with their world in an assertive, confident, and appropriate manner.

Parents also need to equip their child with the necessary social skills that will enable them to choose appropriate friends, and not submit to peer pressure while still being able to retain their friends. A child needs to be assertive and confident while having the grit and determination to succeed.

As parents, we need to ensure that our child is self-regulated, that they have the self-discipline to know how long to spend on devices, are able to prioritise their responsibilities and make appropriate choices.

In order to do this, parents should create clear boundaries in the home, clarify responsibilities with their child, and encourage the child to participate in extra-murals and other activities where they are socialising and interacting appropriately with their peers.

When a child is equipped to handle the playground and competitive situations they should not fall victim to a bully.